ths afterwards, all three sounded me, and declared that one lung was
inoperative, and the other much affected.

Yet, notwithstanding the doctor's discouraging announcement--for he told
me, also, that "it was one of the fatal signs of consumption for the
patient to feel or think he was getting better"--I had a certain
conviction that I was to recover. As soon as the medical man had gone, I
put on my coat and hat and went out for a walk. I trembled much from
weakness, and found it necessary to move very slowly and stop often; but
under the shelter of a wall, courting the warmth of the bright-shining
sun, I managed to make my way to the churchyard.

While I was sitting there alone, the great bell struck out unexpectedly,
and caused me to shake all over; for I was in a very weak condition. It
was the sexton tolling to announce the departure of the soul of some
villager from the world. Having done this, he came out with his boards
and tools to dig the grave. He did not observe me sitting by; so he at
once commenced, and went on diligently with his work. The ground had so
often been broken before that it did not take him long to accomplish his
task; he gradually got deeper and deeper into the ground, till he
disappeared altogether from my sight. I crept to the edge of the narrow
pit in which he was, and looking into it, I could not help thinking of
those words of Kirke White--

"Cold grave, methinks, 'twere sweet to rest
Within thy calm and hallowed breast!"

I had no fear of death, but rather felt that I should welcome it even
more than restoration to health.

I have even now a most vivid remembrance of this, and place it on record
to show how delusive' are our feelings: because I did not feel any
danger, I took it for granted that there really was none. That day,
however, was an eventful one in my life; for, in the gladness of my
heart, I gave myself to God, to live for Him. I had given my will
before, and now I gave my life, and was happy in the deed. I did not
know at that time t

From Death into Life

Notka biograficzna

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